new year

[outfit post] Blue Moons (and other meaningless New Year magics)

If you’re reading this, congratulations. We made it through 2016.

I don’t usually buy into pop-culture hype (okay, that’s a lie; I do), but the whole “2016 was a rough year” business is a bandwagon I can get on. True, a lot of cool stuff–EP, first paying spoken word gig, tons of travel–happened, but it was also a year life taught me a lot. And I’m sure you know what life’s preferred teaching method is.

(It’s pain, guys. Pain.)

Taken at the Stories Told EP launch. Poor kid has no idea what she’s in for.

So yes, 2016 is over, and I am (definitely) older and (hopefully) wiser for it. Maybe the biggest lesson I learned from the year-that-was was not to pin all my hopes on a change in calendar. There is no magic in January starts, in midnight beginnings.

There is only the next 365 days, and what I decide to do with them. Come at me, Life. I’m ready for another year of you.

Dress: Cole Vintage
Denim Jacket : Uniqlo Men’s
Slippers: Havaianas, Maringà


2016: A Year In Review

Haven’t managed to do this consistently, but since 2016 was quite a year, I decided to try and reflect on it. I suppose this survey, all neatly laid out, is a good place to start.  So here I am.  You can view my 2009 and 2010 answers here (2009) and here (2010).

Name of Your Year: The Year I Lived (“Are we out of the woods yet?”)

1. What did you do this year that you’ve never done before?

  • Launched an EP with my band.
  • Went to Israel.
  • Traveled a city by myself. (Singapore!)
  • Plucked on guitar.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
– I didn’t make any resolutions this year, but I’ve made a “Seventeen by 2017” bucket list for next year!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth this year?
– No one I was close to, but a bunch of people at my office had children this year.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

– No, but a ton of celebrities I looked up to did.

5. What countries did you visit this year?
– Singapore, Israel, and Taiwan

6. What would you like to have in the next year that you lacked this year?
– Stability, Consistency, Courage, and Humility.

7. What date(s) from this year will remain etched upon your memory – and why?
– See, I don’t think I’ll remember exact dates unless I check my diaries and online notes and journals, but I can tell you the things I will remember happened this year:

  • Stories Told EPonymous Launch
  • Stories Told RJ Gig (and the consequences thereafter)
  • My first, non-Stories Told songwriting collab session in ages (and how easy-as-breathing it was).
  • Polishing and recording the demo for The Cliff and The Wave
  • Wandering Singapore City by myself at night and hearing live music at Timbre at Substation along Armenian St.
  • Crying in the Finance Office and being unable to work because I thought one of my bandmates was going to leave (me).
  • Falling in crush with the same guy my friend liked and playing Angelica Schuyler for a good month or so.
  • Sailing the Sea of Galilee and sobbing my eyes out at the Garden of Gethsemane.
  • Going to Baguio for the first time with LMC.
  • Spending Christmas Eve with a family I didn’t belong to and feeling so very, very welcomed.

8. What was/were your biggest achievement(s) of the year?

  • The Cliff and The Wave
  • My two juniors surviving–thriving, really–a week without me supervising them.

9. What was your biggest failure of the year?
– Forcing my band to book a gig that wasn’t really in line with our musical “aesthetic” because I wanted to gig so badly, and the way I dealt with the tension thereafter. The overall lack of confidence I had in my own identity as an artist poisoned the water a bit, and to be honest we’re still recovering from it.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration (a public or private personality)?
– My mum, for putting up with me.
– Whoever picked the MMFF entries this year, because they are all awesome.
– The Loudmouth Collective, for putting up with me.
– Marvs Fabular and Dean Carayag, for putting up with me.
– All the millennials who marched against the Marcos Burial, especially the girl who protested alone in front of LNMB.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
– The President.
– America.
– The Marcoses.
– Myself. :))

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about this year?
– EPonymous
– Singapore
– Baguio

I wasn’t excited about Israel because I was so afraid work would blow up while I left, but once I got there I was glad I’d gone.

16. What song(s) will always remind you of this year?
– “The Cliff and The Wave,” because it was the first song that I could be proud of, and it got made this year.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

  • happier or sadder – a little worse for wear, but maybe happier?
  • richer or poorer – same.
  • thinner or fatter – probably largely the same, emphasis on largely.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
– Trusting.  God, myself, the process, etc.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
– 2013: “Doubting myself, indulging in bouts of self-loathing, and lashing out in fits of temper.”
– 2016: “Same, but maybe to a more dramatic degree.”

20. How did you spend the holidays?
– I thought I wasn’t going to make it this year, because I’d ended up a “holiday orphan.” My paternal family, who I’d been spending Christmas with since I was a little girl, all went to New Zealand with my paternal grandfather. I know that they did that because my grandfather has had a difficult time coping with the holidays since my grandmother passed…but I also felt a little like I’d been excluded somehow from a family celebration. It got to this point where I wasn’t looking forward to Christmas at all, until my godmother invited me to her family dinner…and I felt so welcome, not awkward or unwanted at all. It was pretty brilliant.

21. Did you fall in love this year?
– UHM. ERR. YEAH. I ended up liking someone I probably shouldn’t have…

Still do like them, to be honest, but I am doing my best to fix that.

22. What were your favorite TV programs for the year?
– Game of Thrones, because Sansa finally got her moment.

I also started browsing episodes of “Ghost Adventures” because Zak running and screaming and flailing is hilarious, though I’m pretty much not a believer in their heebie jeebies.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
– Actually…no?  I think I hate less people now than I did then.

24. What was the best book you read this year?
The Fantasy Fallacy.

25. What was your favorite film of the year?
– I’m going to go out on a limb and say Saving Sally will be because I’m so ready for it.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?

27. What did you want and get?
– I guess I wanted to figure out where I was going, and I sort-of have a better idea, entering 2017, of what that is.

28. What did you want and not get?
– A boyfriend (ha ha ha) and to get into the Vans Battle of the Bands.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
– Turned twenty-three, and I took the day off to try to negotiate a venue for Loudmouth.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
– A little less self-doubt.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept this year?
– In the words of #TeamVirus, who gave me a special award for it, “Rumarampage.”  Lots of Uniqlo.  Lots of tailoring.  Lots of basics.  Lots of dressing for the ‘gram, but not in an unreasonable fashion.

32. What political issue stirred you the most?

33. Whom did you miss this year?
– I think everyone who stayed was someone who was meant to. I don’t actually think I miss anyone at this point.

34. Who were the people you were grateful to have met/gotten to know this year? (Formerly “Who was the best new person(s) you met this year?”)

  • The Loudmouth Collective
  • Devyn Parsons
  • The Holy Land Pilgrims 2k16, especially Tita Ched and Tita Moje.  (Sorry, I have favorites.)
  • I “got to know” my best friend Esther a lot more this year, and I’m happy for that.
  • Friends from World Extravaganza, specifically Nikki, Jegs, and AJ.
  • I’m glad I got to know my bro Marvs again.

35. What kept you sane?
– God.  Family. Music. Mostly, God.

36. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None?  This was the year I gave up on Hiddleston.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson(s) you learned for this year.
– In 2013: Be brave.  Trust the process.  Just do.  Live in the in-between.  Keep a quiet heart. And Trust God, always.
– In 2016: All this, but only more so.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

“Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in. ”

– Anthem, Leonard Cohen